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Big feelings and behaviour

Strong emotions are a natural part of growing up, for children and for teens. When big feelings lead to challenging behaviour, it can feel confusing and exhausting for families. Children and adolescents are still developing the skills to recognise, manage and express emotions, and behaviour is often a sign of stress, overwhelm or unmet needs.

 

The information on this page is designed to help parents and carers better understand what sits underneath children’s and teens’ behaviour. It offers practical, evidence‑informed strategies to support emotional regulation, strengthen connection, and respond with empathy while maintaining clear and consistent boundaries.

Short Videos

Catholic Schools Maitland‑Newcastle has created a series of short videos in collaboration with leading Australian parenting experts on big feelings and behaviour. These videos provide parents and carers with practical insights and simple, easy‑to‑use strategies designed to support their child’s wellbeing.

How to help kids regulate

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Emotional regulation Part 1

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Emotional regulation Part 2

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High emotions = low intelligence

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Anger is a secondary emotion

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Additional Resources

Triple-P Online

Parenting is full ofups and downs. Sometimes it can feel like guesswork when it comes to improving behaviour and strengthening your relationship with your child. Thisڰ,self-paced programis designed for parents and carers of children under the age of 12 andwill empower you with proven strategies to confidently tackle any challenges that come your way, at every age and stage. From dealing with tantrums, building social skills, boosting cooperation, listening, self-regulation, and more. This’ta rulebook –’sa toolkit to help you feel calmer, solve problems before they get bigger and support your child to reach their full potential.

ParentWorks

ParentWorksis a free online program for parents and caregivers of children 2 to 17. It is an ‘evidence-based’ program, which means that the program has been tested in research and found it be effective in improving parenting skills, parentingconfidenceand child behaviour.

Parents and caregivers may find this program helpful formanaging challenging child behaviours such as tantrums, aggression, non-compliance, inattentive or hyperactive behaviourandsibling conflict. It is designed to also increase participants confidence in their parenting and, provides guidance on working as a team with their partner.ParentWorksis entirely self-directed, which means that you work through the program on your own and there is noassistancefrom a professional during this program.

WellMob

WellMobbrings together online resources made by and forAboriginal and Torres Strait Islander People. On the site, you will findwebsites, apps, podcasts, videos, helplines, socialmediaand online programs all with a focus on social and emotional wellbeing.

ReachOut

ReachOut is a free service, funded by the Australian Government, designed to support parents of teens. Its website includes guidance on arange of topics such as drugs, bullying, social media, mental health and wellbeing, ADHDand alsoincludes information on how parents can access free, professional support with a trained parenting coach.

Anger Is Like Armour

ByShona Innes & Írisz Agócs

This book helps children understand anger as a feeling that shows up when they are hurt,scaredor overwhelmed. Using simple language and gentle illustrations, it supports parents and children to talk about whatanger feels like, why it shows up, and how it can be expressed safely. It is especially helpful for opening calm conversations after big emotional moments.It is best suited for children ages 4-8 years.

 

I Am Peace: A Book of Mindfulness

BySusan Verde & Peter H. Reynolds

This beautifully illustrated book introduces children to mindfulness in a way that feels comforting and accessible. Parents can expect simple ideas around breathing, noticing feelings, and finding calm when worries or big emotions take over. It is designed to be read slowly, with pauses for reflection and shared discussion.It is best suited for children ages 4-10years.

 

My Calm Me Down Book

By Trace Moroney

This practical book supports children to recognise when they are experiencing a “big feelings storm” and offers clear,childfriendlystrategies to help calm their body and mind. Parents will find ideas they can practise alongside their child, such as breathing, movement and sensory activities, making it a useful tool during emotionally intense moments.It is best suited for children ages 4-9 years.

 

My Mindful Brain, My Brain Is a Home, My Brain First Aid, My Breath

ByOrlanda Bettison

TheMy Brainseries helps children understand what is happening in their brain when they experience big emotions. Using simple explanations and friendly characters, these books introduce ideas about how the brain works, why strong feelings show up, and what can help when emotions feel overwhelming. Parents can expect clear, practical strategies that support emotional regulation, mindfulness, and coping skills, making the books especially helpful for shared reading and conversation.

The series is often valued by parents and educators for children who like to knowwhy they feel the way they do, or who benefit from concrete tools rather than reassurance alone. The series is best suited to children ages 5–12 years, with support and discussion from a trusted adult.

 

Parental As Anything

By Maggie Dent

Written by one of Australia’s most trusted parenting voices,Maggie Dent,this book draws together contemporary research, professionalexperienceand real family stories. It supports parents to respond calmly and confidently to children’s and teens’ emotions, with a strong emphasis on connection,coregulationand emotional safety rather than control or punishment.

Best suited to parents of children and teens, particularly those navigating big emotions, anxiety, or behaviour challenges.

 

A Parent’s Guide toSelfRegulation

ByDr Amber Thornton

Thisevidenceinformedbook focuses on the role of the parent’s own emotional regulation as the foundation for helping children regulate theirs. It helps parents recognise triggers, break cycles of escalation, and build calmer responses during emotionally charged moments.

Best suited to parents of children and teens, particularly those feeling overwhelmed by repeated emotional or behavioural challenges.

 

What Makes You Stronger

Dr Louise Hayes, Dr JosephCiarrochi& Ann Bailey

Written by leading Australian psychologists, this book helps parents understand how emotional resilience is built through everyday experiences rather than by avoiding discomfort. Grounded in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) and decades of research, it supports parents to respond more calmly and effectively when children and teenagers experience big emotions,stressor setbacks.

Rather than offering quick fixes, the book focuses on helpingadultsmodel emotional regulation,flexibilityand compassion, recognising that these qualities strongly shape how children learn to manage their own emotions. Parents will find practical,evidencebasedguidance for supporting young people through anxiety, frustration and emotional overwhelm, while also strengthening their own coping skills.

Parental As AnythingHow to help your child manage emotions

ABC Listen

Throwing a tantrum, being naughty and bawling their eyes out. Kids often react to situations that stress them in a waythat’ssocially unacceptable.

A huge part of growing up though is learning how to regulate emotions.Sowhat can parents do to help their kids spotwhat’sgoing to tip them over the edge before it happens?

Parenting expertMaggie Dent finds out from self-regulation expert, Dr Stuart Shanker.

This podcastepisodeis most recommended for parents and carers ofchildrennavigating big feelings, moodchangesor withdrawal.

 

Happy Families-Managing emotional dysregulationwith Dr Justin Coulson

In this practical andeasytofollowepisode, Dr Justin Coulson explains what emotional dysregulation is and why children and teens sometimes react in ways that seem out of proportion to the situation. Using clearneuroscienceinformedexplanations, he helps parents understand the difference between behaviour and the emotions underneath it.

The episode offers simple, realistic strategies parents can use to help children calm their nervous system, build emotional regulationskillsand feel supported rather than judged.

This podcast episode is most recommended for parents and carers of children and teens who experience strong emotional reactions,meltdownsor shutdowns.

 

Emerging Minds-Howis lonelinessimpactingyoung people in Australia?

This episode explores the growing impact of loneliness on children and young people, drawing on Australian research and insights frommentalhealthprofessionals. It helps parents understand how loneliness can show up as mood changes, withdrawal,anxietyor behaviour challenges, particularly during times of transition.Parents are guided to recognise warning signs and consider practical, compassionate ways to support connection, belonging and emotional wellbeing at home and in partnership with schools.


This podcast episode is most recommended for parents and carers ofprimaryagedchildren and adolescents, especially where social connection or wellbeing is a concern.

Smiling Mind

Mental fitnessdoesn’thave to be another thing to add to your to-do list. With the Smiling Mind App, families can use short, age-appropriate sessions to navigate busy mornings, transitions after school, or bedtime routines.

Try practising mental fitness in everyday family moments:

  • In the morning, to enhance focus and calm
  • On the go, to make travel a mindful and enjoyable experience
  • After the school day, to unwind and relax
  • Atmeal times, to create a calm dinner table environment
  • Before bed, to fall asleep—and stay asleep 
  • During weekends, to foster family connection and boost everyone’s mood

Every session is designed to help kidsestablishnew habits and foster positive mental wellbeing and resilience.

Parent Line NSW

Parent Line NSW is a freeand confidentialtelephone counselling and support service for parents and carers with children, aged 0 to 18 years.A team of trained and professional counsellors are available 9am to 9pm, Monday to Friday and 4pm to 9pm on weekends toassistwith guidance whether you are caring for a baby,childor teenager. Call1300 1300 52 or visit their website for more information.

Student Wellbeing in Catholic Schools Maitland-Newcastle

At Catholic Schools Maitland-Newcastle, your child’s wellbeing is at the heart of everything we do.  

Our schools are communities built on faith, respect and genuine care; places where every young person is known, valued and supported to thrive.

Our approach is guided by Catholic identity and shaped by clear policies and practices that nurture student wellbeing, positive relationships and safe behaviour in every school day. 

Learn more